I can now claim the dubious honor of being caught up in two different layoffs at two different startups (one more for the hat trick!). Both times I have been part of a much larger group that was laid off due to dramatic reorganizations that impacted the entire company, and while they were certainly traumatic to some extent, I have viewed both as an uncommon opportunity, as space in which to improve my Self.

I’ve found that when I’m working at any particular job it can be hard to think of next steps.  The mental weight of having that job makes it harder to envision a better / brighter / whatever path.  This “old growth” makes it harder to see what a next step could be, or to see what I would like to improve.  After all, I already have a job, so why would I look for something else that might be a better fit for me?

Having now been laid off twice in my career I’ve found it has a similar effect on my mental state; a (relatively) brief period of trauma followed by more room to expand with new ideas and directions.  I also feel this on a much smaller scale when I get to work on a new project or have a new position… space is created by giving up something old, which allows something new to grow in its place.  The challenge I have is to guide that growth so it serves me, instead of just growing organically.

Uncertain Direction

One of the challenges with getting laid off is it strips away some of our direction.  We no longer have a job to report to, no longer have teammates to whiteboard solutions with, no longer have systems to monitor or memes to send out.  This opens up a wide range of possibilities, but also introduces some uncertainty into what we should do.

This raises questions which lead to more questions which lead to more stress:

• “Why me?….”

• “What did I do wrong to end up here?”

• “How will I make rent in X months?”

• “Who’s hiring?”

• “What will happen to the plant I left at the office?”

While concern is warranted, worry is not a good strategy (it’s right up there with hope).  Instead of focusing on that concern, I’ve begun to view this uncertainty as a freedom (although usually not without a period of freaking out a bit…).  This is really a nice clearing to sit in comfortably for a little while, a space to help me ask slightly different questions:

• “What should I keep doing wherever I end up?”

• “What should I stop doing when I get there?”

• “What do I WANT to do?”

• “How can I do that?”

This shift in mental direction makes it easier for me to be on the lookout for opportunities that I will find of value and provide some personal growth (this blog for example).  By shifting the internal discussion from “this is only terrible” to “hmm, this is a great opportunity” I find it much easier to find new paths forward, paths that maybe I wouldn’t have seen earlier.

I’m not saying this is necessarily easy, especially as other circumstances can add further pressure (having a partner who is also out of work, children to care for, etc).  We certainly need to keep the totality of our lives in mind, but taking the time given to me by getting laid off and investing it in myself has given great results.

The space provided by being laid off generally results in some period of not-working-time.  Not-working-time is uncommon in our adult lives… we may take a week or two vacation, but rarely will get more than two weeks in a row where we’re not required to show up from 9-5 (or 8-6… or 7-7…etc).  After the initial shock wears off, this time can be spent to just…breathe.  Take stock of what you’ve got going on, cultivate your self and enjoy the time you’re not slaved to a clock to finish a project or answer tickets or follow up on some report.

Some folks take this time to travel in ways they couldn’t before (Tahiti for a month?), others use it to get into a hobby they’ve always wanted to (cross-stitch anyone?).  I’ve personally used it to meditate and better understand my self (honestly one of the most challenging, demanding, and rewarding exercises I’ve ever done).  The point isn’t to do a specific thing, but instead to not just focus 1,000% on finding the next job.  Instead use this time to step back, take a breath, and think about how we can create the life we want vs. accepting the one given to us.

Seeing the Clearing in the Trees

Getting laid off is an incredibly stressful event, and it can be incredibly challenging to find the bright spot in losing your job.  While it’s true this is work, and may take a lot of mental energy, it is an incredibly rewarding way to spend this time between jobs.  Some ways I’ve found to help see the space and appreciate it:

• Question yourself - Ask questions to yourself about what you want to learn or do differently with your career and life instead of just how to keep it moving along the same path.

• Chat it up - Talk to friends and family about what they know about you… what they think you’d enjoy doing, or what you’ve enjoyed in the past.  Their perspective is incredibly valuable and can give you great insight into your blind spots.  Talk to (now former) coworkers about what you did well and pursue that.

• Just chill - Take time to indulge a bit more in things you enjoy.  Take a painting class, go somewhere you’ve always wanted to but “couldn’t”, workout.  This rare bit of time if yours to shape into whatever you want.